so in about 4 hours i'm officially going to be 19...wow
really it's not that special cause i'm not 18 which was like WOAH I"M LEGAL or 21 which is like I"M NOT UNDERAGE so really this and 20 are like the awkward cousins you see at family reunions but don't really talk to that much...it's just not gonna be that exciting i feel like.
it's stupid but every year i hope for some kind of change on my birthday like i'm gonna all of a sudden look like Heidi Klum or have snakes for hair like Medusa but those things seem to not really want to appear. I guess part of it is being an only child and having spent your birthday with your parents almost every year to the point where it's like a nice breakfast followed by a fancy dinner and then well... the day's over and you look in the mirror and realize that I'm still me. Like other kids have siblings or their grandparents come with the extended family in tow but mine live really far away so celebrating my birthday is kind of a small affair. You'd think going to college and making more friends would change that but i have a nack for picking people that live on the other side of the country, so all i get are more facebook wall posts than last year or less...you never know. I guess i feel a bit lost as to what today's purpose is and i kinda want it to be super special but i know it won't be and that's bothering me...
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